Saturday, December 22, 2012

Jeez

No updates since November 17th? Oh dormant blog, what shall I do with thee now?

You come and go with an ebb and flow, as my passion for you does wane 

My corner of the 'net does languish, but all the while remains

There it waits for me 

- Wil Harrison



Saturday, November 17, 2012

I'll Mullet Over...

This is the kind of shit I get in my inbox (oh yesth) on a daily basis from my friend Heff.  This one was too good not to pass along, verbatim.

Dude, I just wrote auto insurance on a redneck that looks JUST. LIKE. YOU.

I SHIT YOU NOT - hat, bowling shirt, sweats,  and ALL.

When he walked in, I first thought you were pulling a surprise vacation fuckover visit on me.

Only ONE DIFFERENCE.

- MULLET -

You should really consider growing you a long one.

He looked QUITE powerful and attractive...... 



Not really a mullet but I still say this is my best look.  "Not necessarily stoned but, beautiful".  

Sunday, November 4, 2012

What You Gonna Do Brother?


Jeez, been doing a lot of videos lately here but dammit, I just keep finding things I simply must post.  Today's post is no exception as I bring you yet another one that might have gone under your radar, the Hulk Hogan sex tape.

I guess this one came out a couple of weeks ago showing ole' Thunderlips laying the pipe to his buddy, Bubba The Love Sponge's wife while Bubba filmed it from a distance with his obvious blessing, more than likely one handed.  From what they said it was about 6 years or so ago.  It's pretty grainy but you can at one point see the Hulk's kickstand.  I just love the banter between them and I'm especially digging Hulk's ringtone.  He actually pulls his dong out of her mouth to answer the phone! 

Here you go, and you're welcome.

video

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Two Out Of 3 Is Bad!

video

Holy fucking balls of McClintock, this is frickin' brutal.  For those of you that missed this the other day, here is the vid of Mitt Romney at an Ohio rally joined onstage by Meatloaf, Randy Owen from Alabama and one of the guys from Big & Rich.  I don't know if it's Big or Rich and frankly I don't give a shit anyway.  To his/their credit, he was the best singer on the stage. 

They decided to sing a rousing rendition of "God Bless America" which went from bad to awful quickly.  I don't know if Randy Owen is singing a verse I've never heard before, making shit up or just plain fucking lost.  And then came The Loaf.  Oh my Lord, I can't even describe it, just watch and try and listen for yourself. 

Saturday, October 27, 2012

"Local" Celebrity Endorsements


Listen to the pipes on that gentleman right there.  Wil Harrison, he is the most interesting man in the world, that actually appears in this video. 

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Art And Shit


Random things that blow around the corner onto Wil's Veranda.  I call this "Somewhere a Child Cries".  WilHarrison.com: The place for poignant, sometimes abstract commentary on life

Monday, October 22, 2012

He Got The Beat


I gotta give it to this Brazilian cabbie, that's pretty damn good.  He gets a little off key here and there but doing it a capella is not easy.  Next week maybe I'll post a vid of me singing, "The Greatest Love Of All" in my Caravan.  Now there's a special treat!  

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Potpourri


Scanning through the "On Demand" the other day I came across this fine feature.  I immediately thought of Heff.  I also mused to myself that one of the stars is named "Aryana".  Go ahead, think about that for a minute.  Extra points also for Rachael Ray being in the corner of the screen. 


This is pretty much what I believe.  Actually it's exactly what I believe.


Once again, absolutely fucking not!  The thing that makes me even more queasy is where the guy is sitting that is taking the pic.  Out on the blade!  Of heckity fucks no!


Is this Heaven?  I'm thinking it's pretty damn close. I'll take my chocolate this way please, as opposed to 12 inches at a time.  LOLZ! 

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

The Winnebago Man Responds

Just got this in the mail today.


                                     Click To Enlarge


Ok, can anyone tell me what the fuck this says?  I know it says "Wil" at the top and then it is signed, "Jack Rebney, The Winnebago Man".  So what are the other 3/4 words?  I am pretty sure it is "something something help".  Then again I'm not sure.  Dammit Jack, you could have just had whomever addressed the cards write the shit too and then you could have signed it.  Oh well, I cherish it just the same, and shit.  

Sunday, October 7, 2012

Suicide Solution?


Did anybody happen to catch this Fox News debacle last week?  So much for that 5 second delay.  As soon as I heard about this I went to YouTube and got the raw video.  BEWARE - Yes, this is a video of someone shooting themself, what a shame.

video

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

For The Love Of Boo Berry


This morning I woke up to find this pleasant surprise sitting on my nightstand.  Yep, nothing like a delicious box of frickin' Boo Berry!  Apparently my nephew, Nick, stopped at the store this morning and saw these on the shelf and knew that I would want some.  Now as you might guess, there is a story behind this and yes, I'm gonna tell you all about it.

When I was a kid this was one of my fav cereals.  It was def my fav of the General Mills "monster" line which included Franken Berry and Count Chocula.  Just for your information, Franken Berry and Count Chocula were introduced in 1971 followed by Boo Berry in 1972.  Wil Harrison.com, the place for learning. 

13 years or so ago when I worked at the oil refinery one night me and a couple of the other guys somehow got on the topic of breakfast cereals and I brought up Boo Berry.  We laughed like men and commented on how you never seem to see it in the stores, only it's other 2 more popular brethren.  These are the kind of situations where Wil has become somewhat famous for getting things done.

I went home that morning and dialed into my AOL account (LOL) and started searching for Boo Berry.  I found the General Mills site then contact info and went to the phones!  Wil is truly the master of getting shit done.  They don't call me The Commander for nothing. 

I called General Mills and got ahold of someone in customer service.  I explained the story to her and asked her what could be done.  She explained to me that Boo Berry is only in certain markets/retailers, etc.  I told her this would not suffice!  I needed to deliver the goods.  So that morning I ordered a case of Boo Berry directly from the factory.  I can't recall how many boxes were in their case, I believe it was 8.  I think I paid something like $50 to have them shipped to my house.

As soon as they arrived a few days later I immediately poured myself a heaping bowl of goodness that would turn my milk and excrement that eye pleasing blue hue!  As I dug into it I found it just didn't seem to be quite as good as I remembered it.   How could this be possible, I loved this shit?  I felt just like I did when MTV aired the original "Speed Racer" episodes many years back and 12 minutes into the first episode I found myself saying, "Holy shit, I used to watch this crap?"

I kept 2-3 boxes for myself and brought the rest of them to the guys at work and a couple over to my nephews.  Laughs were shared and life went on.  Time is indeed a cruel thief.  I guess you really can't go back can you? 

Saturday, September 29, 2012

Axes Of Evil

                         Click The Pic For The Full Effect

I took some pics of my current stable today outside cause guitars in the sun always seem to come out really cool. I just picked up the blue Strat the other day so I figured it was time for new glamour shots. Their beauty brings a tear to my eye.

 From L to R:

 '09 Minarik Lotus Studio Xtreme

 '99 Fender Stratocaster Am. Std. Hardtail (Aqua Marine Metallic)

 '80 Hamer Special

 '99 Fender Stratocaster Am. Std. Hardtail (Inca Silver)

 '82 Ibanez SB-70

Here's the new one all by itself.  When I got it it had the original white Fender pickups and knobs, etc.  I replaced the pickups with a set of Seymour Duncan YJM Furys and went with the black knobs and switch tip.  It just seems to make it pop better than just white on white.

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

A Pubic Service Message


A mind is a terrible thing to waste? Think of this men the next time you are frosting the comforter. 

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Misc Shite

Oh Yesth! 

Is that $600 for 1 square foot?  I bet they're nice people though.

Fun on Facebook.  Come on, think about it now.
 
video
Obama kicks ass! 

Well there you have it, just some odds and ends I had in my "Blog Fodder" folder.  Thank you again for your continued patronage, and shit. 

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Tourette's Karaoke

video

Now I know it's not nice or proper to make fun of someone's afflictions or shortcomings but dammit, this is just plain fucking funny.  Hell, even he's laughing.  Tits! 

Sunday, September 16, 2012

Quick Ones

                           As always, click to enlarge

Yeah, it took me a couple of seconds also. 

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Breaking The Law!

This past Monday afternoon I was sitting out on the veranda enjoying another pleasant late summer day here in suburban Chicago when my nephew Nick comes out and hands me my mail. He says to me, "Here's your ticket", to which I laugh. I look at the envelope, looking fairly official, and quickly tear into it only to find this:


Apparently I am a wanton, hardened criminal!  I guess according to the Tinley Park Police I was not able to bring my high powered '94 Dodge Caravan to a complete stop as I was getting ready to make a right turn at 4:59 in the morning.  For those wondering what I was doing out at that time, I was taking my brother-in-law to the workplace.  Here is a close-up of the offense in progress:


Oh the humanity!  The funny thing is I recall this morning and I remember the flash going off and my cunado and I remarking, "Hey, they're taking our picture!".  Bastards!

Well obviously knowing that I was in the right and surely had made a complete stop at least somewhere close to the line, I was slightly peeved.  How dare they try and go after me for $100!  Seeing off to the side it said you could go online and actually see a video of the crime in progress, to the computers I headed.


Ok fuckers, you got me, the check's in the mail. Sassafrassin' rassafrassin'!

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Potpourri

Here's some of the things that I've collected in my "Blog Fodder" folder over the past couple of weeks. I give them to you now in one stunning collection of assorted rabble.


Dude, really?  You couldn't be bothered to put a shirt over your rather masculine frame but maybe next time try and polish up that hot Jackson "whatever the fuck it is" before you try and sell it on the Craigslist.


I saw this on someone elses blog or Facebook the other day, can't recall right now.  Anyway, this was a really stupid idea/trend and it really is a shame.  Read the story here:  

Drowned Bride Couldn't Hold On Any Longer


This is just plain creepy, no other way to describe it. 

Diver's Mummified Body Found In Lake Michigan

Thursday, September 6, 2012

You Don't Know Jack


27 years ago on a hot summer day Jack Rebney hired a film crew and set out to make a promotional film for Winnebago. Things did not go swimmingly. Outtakes were compiled by the crew after the fact and circulated around on VHS tape for years until YouTube came along and Jack went viral as "The Angriest Man in America".  A few years later a filmmaker named Ben Steinbauer decided he would like to see if he could find this angry man which he finally did after months of searching in Northern California. The resulting documentary was released in 2010 entitled, "Winnebago Man". I did indeed see it and enjoyed getting to see the follow up of exactly who this man was/is. So many times we see videos and such and wonder, "did they live through that?" or "I wonder how they turned out after this?" or "where are they now?" It almost gives you some kind of "closure".

The thing that drew me to this "Winnebago Man" was that he reminded me of my late Father, who oddly enough died 3 years ago today. Many o' times you would hear a slew of expletives coming from the garage and the unmistakeable clang of metal tools and the like being flung across the floor or slammed on the workbench.  And yes, we had a Winnebago, LOL.


Now I'm not gonna go into a sob story about how my Father and I never really did see eye to eye and we were not very close.  It was what it was and there's no changing anything now. I do miss him alot. I did turn my Dad and my brothers on to the Winnebago Man vid a few years back and Dad did find it quite funny.  I told him it reminded me of him, I wonder if he saw that angle?  Enough of this now, let's get back to Jack.


Yesterday I got an email alert from the Winnebago Man film site saying that Jack had lost everything in the recent California Ponderosa wildfire.  Jack, now 82 years old and just about totally blind, was living and working as a caretaker at a hunting/fishing lodge or something like that.
 
You sometimes wonder why some people in this world come into your life if only for a brief moment and touch you in some way (knock it off fuckers, this is heartwarming shit).  Today I'm gonna send Jack a note telling him that for some strange reason that incredibly bad day he had back in 1985 in that hot Iowa sun touched me.  I'm gonna tell him that sometimes when I think everything has gone to hell I watch that 4+ minutes of pure comedy and it always makes me feel better here in my world, even if that was never his intention.  I'm gonna print out a picture of my official autographed by him movie poster and I'm gonna put $25 in cash in there to help him out.  I think he needs it more than I do right now.  Is it my way to redemption?  Will it make me feel better about myself?  Maybe.  Will Jack send me back a letter telling me to fuck off?  Maybe.  You just have to know Jack.

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

A Pubic Service Message


Looks more like how to achieve vaginal pain. Would this be called the "pistol grip"? Is it just me or does this not look terribly uncomfortable with 4 fingers really digging in to this coo-coo? Well I guess if a head and body can come out... Also not terribly fond of the urethral opening being called the "ejaculation exit". Been there before, once.

But, in an effort to educate, and you may now amaze your friends, family and co-workers alike with your knowledge, for those of us who didn't know, the "G" in "G-Spot" stands for Grafenberg! (This might have been a record for commas in a sentence. I have no idea how and when I'm supposed to use this fucking thing - ";")

You're welcome. So endeth the lesson.

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Ring Around The Rosie...


My God I so wanna party with and am now quite possibly in love with this girl. 22 year old (deuce-deuces!) Maria Louise Del Rosario from Florida recently became an internet sensation for getting an anal tattoo, yes that's what I said, on camera.

Apparently this is not the first time she's gotten a starfish ornament and we here at WH.com hope it won't be her last!

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Walk This Way


Yay!  Baby Jocelyn got some new shoes the other night and Wil decides to catch yet another precious moment on film, or digital shit or whatever you call it.  Now in the moments of recording before this the mongrel known as Jack decided that he just had to be a part of the festivities by doing a few casual strolls through on camera.  In this edited snippet you'll hear that Wil, your cameraman, had finally had enough of these shenanigans. 

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Help Us!


Jesus H!  Look at the size of this horsefly out on our "veranda"!  I was actually ascared!  I think the bastard was sizing me up.  I quickly scurried back in the house after I was done burning. 

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Craigslist Finds


Ok, you're gonna have to click on the image to make it big enough to see but trust me, it's worth it. I'm planning on bringing a carton myself, wonder what that'll get me!?

Saturday, August 18, 2012

Oh God Dammit!


Click on the image for your full amusement. Yep, that was a $152 mistake.  Actually it wasn't a mistake, I did it on purpose, with malice and shit. 

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Yeah, Yeah. I Know...


And it's not like I've been that terribly busy over here.  I do have a couple of things happening so lemme see if I can get it together and resume the regular chock full o' comedy posting. 

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Oh Fuckity Hecks No!


Dudes, if there's one thing I cannot deal with, it's heights.  That probably explains why I don't like to fly also.  Looking at this picture not only makes me dizzy it also makes me feel all swirly and shit in my lower gut/upper privacy area.  There is absolutely no way in frickin' hell I would ever even think about doing this.  No.


Now that I think about it, I will never be going to the Willis (Formerly Sears) Tower Skydeck either. I don't care if I weighed 87 pounds, there is no way I'm stepping out into a glass box hanging from the 103rd floor, 1,353 feet in the air. There is pretty much nothing you could give me to do this. Negative.

                               Oh go to hell little girl!  

Friday, July 27, 2012

Quandary


Ok, so how in the Hell am I supposed to fix these things with the dandy new fix-it kit I bought when I can't see a damn thing cause I'm not wearing them? 


Shit, I had to take a picture of all of the parts against a white background just so I could see them.  This is gonna be a treat.  Not to mention the fact that my hands are big to begin with and trying to manipulate anything as small as this is not very easy.  And I assure you I've never uttered that sentence before in any context. 

But wait!


Surprise!  Wil has the tool!  I knew I bought this thing for something (enough snickering fuckers).  I am happy to report that I was able to fix my glasses with very little tribulation in a matter of minutes.  It's the simple victories in life my friends. 

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

I'm Certainly Not Going Jogging


This commercial makes me LOL.  I guess there's a series of these but this is the one that shows in my area. 

Friday, July 20, 2012

You Wanna Go?

video

Interesting minute or so video (watch it dammit, it's only a little over a min) of Blackhawks prospect Garret Ross playing in a scrimmage game wearing a mic.  How gentlemanly they are when preparing to duke it out!  This is a cool behind the scenes look.  Have a great weekend!

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Itchy, Scratchy


Wil is off to see a dermatologist today, details to follow. 

Monday, July 16, 2012

RIP Jon Lord


Iconic keyboard master of one of Wil's absolute favorite bands, Deep Purple's Jon Lord died today at the age of 71. 

From The Washington Post: By Associated Press, Updated: Monday, July 16, 1:12 PM

LONDON — British rocker Jon Lord, former keyboardist for the band Deep Purple, has died. He was 71 years old.

A statement on Lord’s official website says the Leicester, England-born musician suffered a fatal pulmonary embolism in London on Monday after a long battle with pancreatic cancer.

Lord co-wrote some of Deep Purple’s most famous tunes, including “Smoke on the Water,” and later had a successful solo career following his retirement from the band in 2002.

The statement posted on Lord’s website said he died “surrounded by his loving family.”


Nobody could play and "rock" a keyboard like this people.  Thank you Jon for everything, you were truly an influence on me and many others.  

Friday, July 13, 2012

100 Riffs


I really didn't mean to post 3 videos in a row but when I find stuff that's really interesting, it's my duty to share it with you is it not?  Yes this video is 12 minutes long but it's really worth watching, especially for you musical types out there.  This guy plays some great riffs note for note.  Hell, I learned about 5 or 6 things watching this.  Ahh, the versatility of the Fender Stratocaster.

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Go Fish!

video

I heard about this vid on the radio today so I of course had to rush home to check it out, it does not disappoint.  Seems like this young lady just about pulled in A LOT more than she bargained for.  Check it out. 

Friday, July 6, 2012

Let My Love Open The Door?

video

Sitting here thinking about it, I think I'll plug this into that power inverter I've got in my van and drive around with it hanging in the window! Oh the possibilities!

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Wouldn't You Give A Hand To Your Friend?


I came across this pic the other day whilst perusing my misc pic site where I find all of the "Random Shots".  I thought to myself, "Isn't that nice of that little feller to help out the other gent when obviously his hands are busy at the moment holding something behind his back/arse?"  You can even see the admiration, dare I say devotion in his gaze.  Sometimes all is right with the world.  Have a nice day!

Friday, June 29, 2012

Can You See The Real Me?


With all this talk about beard coloring and such, why not just take it another direction?  Much like a comet or an eclipse, this is a side of Wil that is RARELY seen.  Ahh, "Fun With Facial Hair".  Enjoy, and have a nice weekend!

Monday, June 25, 2012

Coming Soon...

Yeah, I'm sure this will go off without a hitch.  Stay tuned for this.

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

These Rose Colored Glasses...

So the other day I get this email from Heff, cause he has nothing else to do at work, as most of you know.  He brings up this point and I don't know if I agree with him, what do you think?

Wil at 44
  
Just to put this out there....Your last blog post...the picture of YOU that you put up and said it was the NINTH photo you took of yourself, but the FIRST that you said you were happy enough with to post ?........

......YEAH.......

DUDE - that's the FIRST picture of you "of age" that I could actually see ANY resemblance of you as a CHILD (or a teenager) in - EVER.

- FUCKIN' FREAKY -

Hell, HEFF has changed his look A LOT over the years (and mostly NOT by choice), but I can run in to assholes at the local "Poggly Woggly" that I haven't seen since grades 1 - 6, and somehow, they STILL remember & recognize me....

Maybe you've got a GOOD THING GOIN', LOL !!!


 Wil at 9

  Wil at 14
Wil at 21
 
 Wil at 38

Shit, I'm having trouble seeing the resemblance just between these pics!  And now, just for shits and giggles, let's look at Heff, shall we?  

Young Heff

Stoner Heff

Modern Heff

Feel free to discuss...